Drama. I flee from it like I do from giant spiders. Drama reminds me of junior high girls and their hormonal roller coaster of emotions full of temper tantrums and boy problems. Drama and I are like oil and water. We don’t mix.
Then my life got dramatic. And it kept going.
I’ve been dragging my heels, wearing the cloak of shame, embarrassed of my “dramatic” life. Just when I think things are on the upswing it feels like it crashes down and the roller coaster cycle begins. I fight the inner battle to let go what others looking in think of this seemingly unraveled life and adventure we are on.
I am here to tell you, I don’t have it together and this walk of faith is a wild ride. Let me reassure you following Jesus is NOT boring. Following Jesus is messy and unrefined.
I have continued to carry this garment of embarrassment of my unrefined life until God gave me freedom one evening when he reminded me of the story of Joseph.
Joseph’s life must have looked like a tragedy to the outside world. I am sure the people around him and even his friends mocked him for following a God who would allow such bad things to occur over and over. I can imagine Joseph’s abnormal life raised concerns and many vocal opinions. If you aren’t sure what I am referencing here is a quick list of his “dramatic” life.
- At age 17 Joseph had a dream and told his brothers which caused his brothers to hate him all the more.
- Brothers sold him into slavery
- His master’s wife kept enticing him to sleep with her…Joseph did what was right and then she turned around and accused him for trying to sleep with her.
- His master was upset over the news that he threw Joseph in prison
- The chief cupbearer promised Joseph to mention him to the Pharaoh and get him out of jail … however he did not remember Joseph, he forgot him.
- Joseph sits in jail for 2 more years. I am sure it was lonely and confusing place to be when you know God has made you promises and you are locked up.
- He interprets Pharaoh’s dream and taken out of prison
- Was put in charge of the whole land of Egypt (30 years old) Genesis 41:30
13 years. Can you imagine 13 long years of dramatic trials, of waiting, of wondering, and of hurting? Yet, Joseph’s faith was not destroyed by his circumstances and “The Lord was with Joseph, so he succeeded in everything he did as he served in the home of his Egyptian master.” God blessed Joseph where he was at. There were blessings to be found in the lonely seasons, prison cells and slave master’s home.
When we follow Jesus it is NOT about having it all together, life tied in a pretty bow….it’s actually the opposite. Walking with Jesus isn’t about having our financial ducks in a row, or our safety and security. It’s about obedience–reckless abandonment to the King of Kings. It’s about His glory. The rest of the story is in his hands…out of our control. At the end of the story Joseph could declare God used it all for good. Though Joseph was righteous he was NOT kept from suffering. He was preserved by his faith through it and in the end could acknowledge God meant it all for good.
I think we all have issues, righteous or unrighteous we have problems and some “drama” in our lives. Some of us are just better at spending our energy burying it and focusing on the dramatic lives of others. I find this most saddening because we miss Jesus when we do that. Jesus is found in lonely prison cells, accusations, abandonment, desperation, hopelessness, enemies, misunderstandings, and pain.
It’s time to stop working so hard at making pretty lives and pretending we have life all together. Let’s stop hiding. It’s freeing to let it all go and hand it over to Jesus. Allow Jesus to meet you right where we are at. Drama and all.